用英文「溝通」是一回事，可以「開心聊天」又是另一回事！
每天生活中是不是有很多有趣的故事？
如果有什麼好笑值得分享的經驗
用中文可以講得活靈活現
換成英文就變得無聊又單調
這樣真是太可惜啦！
今天來教你怎麼用簡單的一兩個字
讓你換個語言也不改原本的風趣迷人：
平常用中文喜歡跟朋友講點浮誇的詞語來聊天，但換成英文就變得死板板？Jade 老師首先為你講解怎麼樣有趣地使用英式英文！你可以假裝上流社會、你可以用一些咒罵詞、你可以用一些俚語，你也可以像老師示範地那樣把一些普通單字加強語氣，真是千變萬化：
【英文技巧】用對英文「單字」，讓你變得更有趣！ (Words to make yourself more interesting)
英國腔很有趣吧？以下我們整理的單字，也可以讓你輕鬆用英文表達某物「真的超@#^&^#%」：
terribly excited
an awful good time
damn ghetto from hell
goddamn gorgeous
goddamn ghetto
terribly sorry
Thank you so much
You are so bad…
kill me
horrifying experience
horrific good time
下面的對話為你示範怎麼用這些詞語跟閨密大肆抱怨你與介紹對象的初次見面：
A: How did the blind date go? I am terribly excited to hear all about it.
A: 初次見面還好嗎？我超興奮的，快一五一十地跟我說吧。B: Well…
B: 這樣講啊…A: Oh no, what happened?
A: 哎呀，怎麼了？B: Everything was going well, and I was having an awful good time. You know all I do is work, it’s rare for me to wear a nice dress, and go out for dinner. He seemed like a real gentleman, handsome, composed, and confident.
B: 本來一切都很順利，我真的很高興。你知道我一直在工作，穿件漂亮的洋裝很出去吃晚飯真的滿難得的，而他看起來真是個紳士，瀟灑、有風度又有自信。A: Good…
A: 很好啊！B: Then without anyone asking, he started to go on and on about what went wrong in his previous marriages. Did you know that he was married five different times?
B: 然後雖然根本沒人問，他卻開始描述他以前的婚姻出錯的地方。你知不知道他已經結過五次婚了？A: What?
A: 什麼？B: Yes, and he did a rather in-depth analysis on the flaws on all his ex-wives. One of them is not even with us anymore.
B: 是的，他還對他的前妻們的缺陷做了相當深入的分析。我的意思是，其中一人根本已經不在了。A: I don’t understand.
A: 不懂。B: She passed away a few years ago, and he was still bad-mouthing her.
B: 她前幾年去世了，而他還在講她的壞話。A: I am terribly sorry, he is a likable guy at work, and I always thought that you two would hit it off.
A: 我真的很抱歉，他在辦公室很受歡迎，我一直以為你們兩個會蠻合得來的。B: So did he. Towards the end of the evening, he had the audacity to inform me that all the prenuptial agreement was signed before he got married, you know, each, and every of the five different ones.
B: 他才是。約會快結束時，他還大言不慚地告訴我，他結婚前都有簽婚前協議，你知道，他簽過整整五份不同的婚前協議書！A: …
B: Then he walked me home, and commented that my neighborhood looked like a ghetto, or I should say, the damn ghetto from hell. And he told me that women like me should realize that I need a man to take care of me, and give me a better life.
B: 然後，他陪我走回家，並說我家附近看起來像一個貧民窟，或者我應該說，「地獄中的該死的貧民窟」。他告訴我，像我這種女人應該了解到我需要一個男人來照顧我，並給我更好的生活。A: What did you say?
A: 妳說了什麼？B: I told him: “Thank you so much for your informative observation!”
B: 我告訴他：「超級感謝您細膩的觀察力！」A: You are so bad…
A: 妳好壞…B: Then he tried to kiss me. I backed away, and told him that I got to get up early for Pilates. Then my goddamn gorgeous dress and I shut the door in his face. Hope he found his way home okay in my goddamn ghetto neighborhood.
B: 他還試圖吻我，我退開了，並告訴他我要早起去做皮拉提斯。然後我和我該死的美麗洋裝就當著他的面狠狠把門甩上了，希望他可以從該死的貧民窟平安回家。A: Hahaha. Kill me. You missed yoga like the past 500 Saturday mornings, and you said you do Pilates in the morning.
A: 哈哈哈。打敗我吧。妳過去 500 個週六早上都錯過了瑜伽，妳還說妳早上要做皮拉提斯。B: Hey, as luck would have it, the next day, I felt so relieved to have my single life, I actually went to yoga. The instructor was glad to see me, and I told her you and I will see her on Monday.
B: 嘿，幸運的是，我第二天為我的單身生活感到很欣慰，結果真的跑去上瑜伽了。老師看到我很高興，我告訴她我和你會跟她週一再見。A: Oh, that’s nice.
A: 哦，那很好。B: Of course, now go grab your bag, we have to be there in 30 minutes.
B: 當然，去拿你的包，我們 30 分鐘內就要到了。A: Okay… that’s the least I can do.
A: 好吧… 這是我至少我可以做的。B: Thanks for a horrific experience though. Sometimes we need a bit of awakening to see how lucky we are to have good friends, fulfilling jobs, and the luxury of carefree evenings.
B: 雖然這個可怕的經歷，但還是感謝你。有時候我們需要一點當頭棒喝才會意識到好朋友、工作有成就，還有寶貴的、無憂無慮的夜晚是多幸運。A: No problem, I’m looking forward to set up another opportunity for you to have a horrifying good time.
A: 沒問題，我期待過不久就有個幫你籌備可怕好時光的機會呦。B: …
接下來這一批堪稱髒話的單字雖然乍看之下有點不雅，不過在日常英文中還滿常被用的，所以只要注意使用時機、用在朋友間放鬆聊天的話，可以很有效地表達戲劇效果。 “fucking” 是個在句子裡位置非常彈性的神奇單字，看下去你就知道了：
Bloody perfect!
a mile freaking long
any bloody service
fucking suffocate
the bloody crowd
my poor self
a bloody nightmare
Holy fuck!
I see him with my own fucking eyes.
I fucking hope so!
I am so fucking happy for you!
I missed you guys so fucking much.
Anything you fucking want!
Why are we fucking talking this?
I don’t fucking know, I am just so fucking happy!
calm the fuck down.
Sounds like an awesome fucking plan!
再來看看這個對話示範：
Wife: How was the exhibition?
老婆: 展覽怎麼樣？Husband: Bloody perfect!
老公: 真他媽完美！Wife: What happened?
老婆: 發生了什麼？Husband: The line for the tickets was a mile freaking long. By the time I finally got inside, there were people everywhere. I stopped at this booth to look at some products, and there was no one there to offer me any bloody service. I thought I was going to fucking suffocate. So I fought my way through the bloody crowd to escape, walked to the coffee shop near our old high school, and thought that I can go get some lunch by my poor self.
老公: 光是買票就排了他媽的一英里長。我好不容易進去了以後卻摩肩接踵。我在攤位駐足，卻完全沒有人提供任何該死的服務。我以為我要他媽的窒息了。所以我從該死的人群中掙扎的逃離了，走到我們以前高中附近的咖啡館，可憐兮兮地一個人吃點中飯。Wife: Sorry my poor baby… sounds like a bloody nightmare.
老婆: 我可憐的寶貝… 聽起來像一個恐怖的惡夢。Husband: Actually, not really.
老公: 其實沒有欸。Wife What do you mean?
老婆: 什麼意思？Husband: The place is remodeled, and it is beautiful. Remember Andy, you, and I used to go there everyday after school, and we loved to sit by the corner with the view.
老公: 那個地方裝修了，變得很漂亮。妳還記得安迪，妳和我以前放學後每天都去那裡，我們最愛坐在角落看風景。Wife: Of course.
老婆: 當然。Husband: Remember Andy said that if he ever finds a job in Taipei, he will move back from Canada, and spend more time with his family.
老公: 記得安迪說如果他在台北找到工作時，他就會從加拿大搬回來，並花更多的時間與家人在一起。Wife: Yes, that was what he said last time he was here. I hope everything is well with him.
老婆: 對呀，上次他來是這麼說。我希望他一切順利。Husband: Well, why don’t you ask him yourself…
老公: 這樣啊，你為什麼不自己問他…Wife: Holy fuck! Andy, what are you doing here?
老婆: 老天爺！安迪，你怎麼在這裡？Andy: Hahaha. I just got back yesterday! I came out for a walk after hanging out with my mom all day, and thought I can stop at our old hangout. I sat down at our corner table for about five minutes, and was about to call your husband. Meanwhile, the doors opened, and I see him with my own fucking eyes.
安迪: 哈哈哈，我昨天剛回來！今天整天都在陪我媽，現在才出來散個步，就想到我們以前老是聚會的地方坐坐。我剛在我們靠角落的桌子坐下來五分鐘，正要打電話給你老公時，門就開了，然後我就他媽親眼看到他了。Wife: This is great! Are you here to stay?
老婆: 好棒！你要留下來嗎？安迪: I fucking hope so! I am in going to a firm for a final interview on Monday. And if everything goes well, I’ll be setting up camp here.
安迪: 我他媽的希望如此！星期一我要去一家公司做最後的面試。如果一切順利，我會在這裡定下來。Wife: I am so fucking happy for you! Welcome home!
老婆: 我他媽的超替你開心！ 歡迎回家！Andy: Thank you! I missed you guys so fucking much. What are we going to do to catch up?
安迪: 謝謝！我他媽的真想念你們。我們聚會要做什麼？Wife: Anything you fucking want! Why are we fucking talking like this?
老婆: 他媽的你想要什麼都可以！我們為什麼他媽的這樣子講話？Andy: I don’t fucking know, I am just so fucking happy!
安迪: 我他媽的不知道啊，我只是太他媽的太高興了！Husband: Okay, you two, calm the fuck down. We don’t want him to go to his important interview on Monday with a potty mouth.
老公: 好啦，你們兩個安份點。我們不想他星期一滿嘴髒話的去重要的面試。Wife: Okay… Let’s rest for a while, and we will take him to dinner later.
老婆: Okay… 我們休息一下，然後我們晚點帶他去吃晚飯。Andy: Sounds like an awesome fucking plan!
安迪: 聽起來像個他媽的好計劃！
學完可以運用的單字與用法，來練個口說吧：
VoiceTube 幫你安排好每日口說練習句！搭配主持人 Kristi 和 Daniel 對發音、語調等詳細解說，聽完例句、講解以後自己錄音作檢討，一點一滴累積往 native speaker 程度邁進！我們都在這裡練習了，你也加入吧：
文／王傳瑄
圖／bossfight, CC Licensed
作者簡介／VoiceTube看影片學英語
學英文不是艱難的任務，而是一種融入生活的自然態度，今天起，丟掉厚重的教科書，每日鎖定VoiceTube看影片學英語官方部落格，給自己一個流利『用』英語的機會！