an awful good time
damn ghetto from hell
Thank you so much
You are so bad…
horrific good time
A: How did the blind date go? I am terribly excited to hear all about it.
A: Oh no, what happened?
B: Everything was going well, and I was having an awful good time. You know all I do is work, it’s rare for me to wear a nice dress, and go out for dinner. He seemed like a real gentleman, handsome, composed, and confident.
B: Then without anyone asking, he started to go on and on about what went wrong in his previous marriages. Did you know that he was married five different times?
B: Yes, and he did a rather in-depth analysis on the flaws on all his ex-wives. One of them is not even with us anymore.
A: I don’t understand.
B: She passed away a few years ago, and he was still bad-mouthing her.
A: I am terribly sorry, he is a likable guy at work, and I always thought that you two would hit it off.
B: So did he. Towards the end of the evening, he had the audacity to inform me that all the prenuptial agreement was signed before he got married, you know, each, and every of the five different ones.
B: Then he walked me home, and commented that my neighborhood looked like a ghetto, or I should say, the damn ghetto from hell. And he told me that women like me should realize that I need a man to take care of me, and give me a better life.
A: What did you say?
B: I told him: “Thank you so much for your informative observation!”
A: You are so bad…
B: Then he tried to kiss me. I backed away, and told him that I got to get up early for Pilates. Then my goddamn gorgeous dress and I shut the door in his face. Hope he found his way home okay in my goddamn ghetto neighborhood.
A: Hahaha. Kill me. You missed yoga like the past 500 Saturday mornings, and you said you do Pilates in the morning.
A: 哈哈哈。打敗我吧。妳過去 500 個週六早上都錯過了瑜伽，妳還說妳早上要做皮拉提斯。
B: Hey, as luck would have it, the next day, I felt so relieved to have my single life, I actually went to yoga. The instructor was glad to see me, and I told her you and I will see her on Monday.
A: Oh, that’s nice.
B: Of course, now go grab your bag, we have to be there in 30 minutes.
B: 當然，去拿你的包，我們 30 分鐘內就要到了。
A: Okay… that’s the least I can do.
A: 好吧… 這是我至少我可以做的。
B: Thanks for a horrific experience though. Sometimes we need a bit of awakening to see how lucky we are to have good friends, fulfilling jobs, and the luxury of carefree evenings.
A: No problem, I’m looking forward to set up another opportunity for you to have a horrifying good time.
接下來這一批堪稱髒話的單字雖然乍看之下有點不雅，不過在日常英文中還滿常被用的，所以只要注意使用時機、用在朋友間放鬆聊天的話，可以很有效地表達戲劇效果。 “fucking” 是個在句子裡位置非常彈性的神奇單字，看下去你就知道了：
a mile freaking long
any bloody service
the bloody crowd
my poor self
a bloody nightmare
I see him with my own fucking eyes.
I fucking hope so!
I am so fucking happy for you!
I missed you guys so fucking much.
Anything you fucking want!
Why are we fucking talking this?
I don’t fucking know, I am just so fucking happy!
calm the fuck down.
Sounds like an awesome fucking plan!
Wife: How was the exhibition?
Husband: Bloody perfect!
Wife: What happened?
Husband: The line for the tickets was a mile freaking long. By the time I finally got inside, there were people everywhere. I stopped at this booth to look at some products, and there was no one there to offer me any bloody service. I thought I was going to fucking suffocate. So I fought my way through the bloody crowd to escape, walked to the coffee shop near our old high school, and thought that I can go get some lunch by my poor self.
Wife: Sorry my poor baby… sounds like a bloody nightmare.
老婆: 我可憐的寶貝… 聽起來像一個恐怖的惡夢。
Husband: Actually, not really.
Wife What do you mean?
Husband: The place is remodeled, and it is beautiful. Remember Andy, you, and I used to go there everyday after school, and we loved to sit by the corner with the view.
Wife: Of course.
Husband: Remember Andy said that if he ever finds a job in Taipei, he will move back from Canada, and spend more time with his family.
Wife: Yes, that was what he said last time he was here. I hope everything is well with him.
Husband: Well, why don’t you ask him yourself…
Wife: Holy fuck! Andy, what are you doing here?
Andy: Hahaha. I just got back yesterday! I came out for a walk after hanging out with my mom all day, and thought I can stop at our old hangout. I sat down at our corner table for about five minutes, and was about to call your husband. Meanwhile, the doors opened, and I see him with my own fucking eyes.
Wife: This is great! Are you here to stay?
安迪: I fucking hope so! I am in going to a firm for a final interview on Monday. And if everything goes well, I’ll be setting up camp here.
Wife: I am so fucking happy for you! Welcome home!
老婆: 我他媽的超替你開心！ 歡迎回家！
Andy: Thank you! I missed you guys so fucking much. What are we going to do to catch up?
Wife: Anything you fucking want! Why are we fucking talking like this?
Andy: I don’t fucking know, I am just so fucking happy!
Husband: Okay, you two, calm the fuck down. We don’t want him to go to his important interview on Monday with a potty mouth.
Wife: Okay… Let’s rest for a while, and we will take him to dinner later.
老婆: Okay… 我們休息一下，然後我們晚點帶他去吃晚飯。
Andy: Sounds like an awesome fucking plan!
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